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Give it up

I’m not sure I can do this anymore. I’m too obsessive and the structure of blogging, particularly the ‘likes’ and ‘followers’ part gets into my head. I post. I check back then, again and again to see how many views it has. I’m pleased by likes and delighted when someone chooses to follow me. I don’t do this with my other writing, my creative fiction. That process is much more contained and much less concerned with what other people think.

I imagine that this might support that. I’ll build up a readership base, advertise my work, hopefully impress people enough to give my novel a try. It makes sense. I suppose. But I don’t think I can do it because this process with, which is overtly self-conscious might drain creative energy from my other work. Fiction, my fiction at least, is the translation of subjective experience into art. Impressions impact my mind, ideas fill me up like a sink. My writing is like dipping a cup into the sink, pouring it out carefully, deliberately. I think this writing is like a hole in the sink, draining off the ideas and impressions before they’ve had a chance to sit, mix, churn and grow.

I’m not going to shut the site down, like the last time, but I am going to post less frequently. Much less so. And only fiction. Completed before it gets here. None of this self-conscious faux-advertising.

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